I’m writing to you, my friends, because you’ve made a difference. I expect no reply but I wanted you to know that you have done more than you may realize.
Some of you may know that my family has become a bit smaller. Yesterday as we celebrated mothers’ day with my maternal mother. It was a bit different the previous mothers’ days. My stepmother died five days ago on the 5th of May. My father and her were celebrating their twenty fifth wedding anniversary when she was air lifted to a hospital where she began her decent. I’ve been thinking a lot about how I should feel and I’m not coming up with any answers. Carolyn and I were not that close but she was a good person. She had my best interest at heart and more important to me, she was a great companion to my pops. With Carolyn’ passing, my pops is now alone and this scares me.
Pops and I have also not been close for one reason or another. There is no set in stone reason for this. The fact is, we are just different people. Ok maybe that last statement is not true. Maybe the fact is, we are exactly the same person and it is difficult to talk to him. I have made a point to stop lying to myself and for the most part, I have done well with that. So why is it so difficult to talk to my father? Is it because I feel that we are the same and he should know exactly what I feel? Is it because I have grown accustom to communicating a certain way so much that I am unyielding to learn or bend to the ways of others? Why can I not talk with this person?
Yesterday was supposed to focus on motherhood. As my ma, sister, my sisters’ husband and his family sat around the picnic table my thoughts wandered to my father who was alone. We spent time talking and reminiscing about the past days. We also made plans for future days but it was a sad day full of half smiles.
Today, while mothers’ day has passed I ask you, the reader, and my friend, someone who has made a difference in my life, and someone who has taught me something, to do something special. I ask you to take five minutes to reflect on someone you love. Call your mom, your pops, your brother or sister, heck call your answering machine and leave a message for your furry-butted cats. If this loved one is still around and living, give them a call or shoot them an email telling them that they are special to you. Tell them that they have made a difference in your life and you are very grateful for every moment that you have spent together. While you are doing that, I will be picking up the phone and calling pop with no agenda but simply to tell him that I am thinking of him and that I love him.
The Obituary of Carolyn Margaret Nickey
http://bit.ly/13Case
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~M
